Crazy Just Got Sexy
by moronic madness
Summary: Told in 2 POVs by 2 original characters, Nikki and Felix.
1. Chapter 1

Crazy Just Got Sexy

Seventeen year old Nikki walked through Ouran High School with one thought in mind, _don't fuck it up_. She brushed nervously at her shoulder length black hair as she looked up to the room numbers.

"A music room? Way back here? Hmm…I hear sounds. Could prove interesting" she whispered to herself as she neared the door. She opened it to find a room filled with other Ouran girls, and a small group of boys who seemed to be entertaining the girls. _How odd…_

"Hello, beautiful. I haven't seen you around the school before…are you new?" a tall and thin boy with shaggy blonde hair and blue eyes smiled, holding a rose to her. Nikki eyed him for a moment and nodded.

"I am…and I seemed to have come across the wrong room. What is this?" she looked around and her eyes fell onto two boys, identical twins with orange hair and piercing green eyes. They held onto each other with intimacy that almost made Nikki smile.

"This, my lady, is Ouran Academy's finest group of talented and handsome boys with too much time on their hands. We are here to entertain the Ouran ladies who, also, have too much time on their hands. We are the Ouran High School Host Club. How may we be of assistance to you?" the boy smiled brightly and motioned to the other boys in the room.

"That's all and well, but who are they?" Nikki pointed to the twins who were each making a group of three girls melt.

"The Twins, Hikaru and Kaoru Hitachiin. I'd tell you which is which, but it's likely you'll never find out. They…well…you'll find out if you hang around here enough. I'm Tamaki, by the way, Tamaki Suoh."

"How may I speak with the Twins?" Nikki looked around to the other boys: a little blonde who was with a tall silent black-haired one, and another with black hair who had glasses and was writing in a notebook. _Strange club…_

"If you'll give me a moment I can speak with Kyoya and see if they have a cancelation." The blonde ran off to the boy with the glasses. Nikki watched the little blonde boy eat loads of sweets and heard affectionate "Oh Hunny if you eat that you might get too sweet for us to handle." From the girls around him. _Very strange club…_ she decided.

"You're in luck! The Twins have an opening in 10 minutes. Would you care to wait until then?" Tamaki motioned to a large couch and Nikki took a seat. "If you need anything just call and someone will be at your side." He gave another smile before running off to his group of girls.

"Tamaki senpai can be a little abrupt, but he means well." A voice came from behind Nikki. She turned to see a person with brown hair and eyes offering a cup of tea. Nikki took it and nodded.

"So I've noticed. Tell me…why are you in a boy's uniform? You are a girl, right?"

"Huh? Oh…well…yes, but the girls here don't know that. But that's a long story, I'm Haruhi Fujioka." She extended her hand and Nikki shook it before taking a sip of her drink. "If you're to be with the Twins, don't try to tell them apart. It's hard and even Senpai can't do it. I can, but that's because I really pay attention. Their actions are very different." Haruhi watched the boys with Nikki.

"Tell me which is which. I want to know."

"The one on the left is Hikaru, right Kaoru. Don't be surprised if they tell you different, though." Haruhi didn't elaborate and Nikki didn't ask. They just sat together and watched the hosts entertain for the rest of Nikki's wait time.


	2. Chapter 2

I fiddled with the cat ears attached to my head sending a loud rustle of sound to my hearing aid. Cringing and removing my hand, I tried once again to tune out the teacher as she rambled on and on.

_Only a few more moments until the school bell rung and I'd be free… to do research for my science class. School life is truly and slow and long life._

I nodded off for a couple moments when I was startled by the sound of the bell ringing. I looked around wearily and smiled when I saw students packing their things and leaving. I slung my school issued bag on my shoulder and rushed past various students trying to avoid being trampled by the much taller students. I looked to my left and saw one of the three libraries. Thus I begin my trek through mountains of books and dangerously boring words within said books.

_Stupid, mean libraries! Hell, stupid, mean students! Not a single person can open a door for a tiny person holding enough books that they literally go over head._

I let out a long breath trying to calm down. I focused my attention back into the task of finding the other library for even more books. I looked as much as I could to left and right trying to figure off where I had wandered off to in my fury.

_Ok, if I am, where I think I am, it should be this door right here._

I fiddled with the handle for a moment before the door swung slowly open. It was surprisingly quiet compared to the other library!

_I should have came down here so much sooner! Maybe now I won't have to read a sentence three times before I can get through it!_

"Oh my, it's a walking stack of books!" I heard a male voice come from in front of me.

I tried desperately to crane my neck to see who it was that spoke, but to luck did it work. I finally gave up my grip on the books and lowered them to the ground. The first thing I noticed was the room I was in most certainly not a library. The room was filled with tasteful but eloquent furniture. Girls grouped in small herds, each with a rather cute boy in the center. I turned back to the blonde boy standing in front of me. Apparently, he saw the confused look that crossed my face and gave a classy smile before talking.

"Welcome to Ouran Host Club," he slid to my side and began to gently guide me around the room. "I am Tamaki Souh! Here we entertain the lovely girls, such as yourself, and keep them happy. Who would you like as a host this fine afternoon?"

My eyes widened and tried to stammer out any kind of answer but he quickly interrupted before any sembalence of a word came out of my mouth.

"You seem like a 'Hunni' person! Let's go meet him, shall we?" He turned to face a table holding three girls along with a small blonde boy and tall stoic boy staning behind him. The stoic one seemed to be trying to restrain the blonde one from eating a piece of cake. "Hm? Well it seems that in few minutes Hunni will be ready! Have a seat right here and relax. He'll be ready for you in a few more minutes!"

Tamaki pranced off to another table where he began to talk with the girls sitting there. I let out a soft sigh resigning myself to my fate. I looked to my left and noticed another girl waiting there. Her eyes darted to my cat ears for a moment before looking me in the face. I gave a crooked smile before waving slightly.

_All I wanted was the library! But no! I ended up finding a possibly forbidden club in a still unknown part of the giant school… and I still have that research paper do tomorrow. Welcome to Japan, Felix. Welcome to Japan._

* * *

**A/N:** Hello my people! As you may have noticed, this is two different authors! One being my friend, whose fanfic name escapes me, and yours truly, BlazyBatty (look it up! :3). We will be switching between chapters and hopefully often… but due to school and my own laziness, you may be waiting awhile for my chapters and come out once hers are posted… my bad ^_^'… Anyway! So yes, this a collaboration and yes, you do want to add this to your favorites and leave a comment *tries to use watch to hypnotize readers*… Did it work? Lol! But thankies for reading and hope you continue to do so!


	3. Chapter 3

Nikki watched another girl enter the room, donned with cat ears that made her look rather childish, but cute. She chuckled and turned back to watching the boys known as the Hitachiin Twins. Their conversation seemed to be winding down and a small RING ran through the air.

"I'm sorry ladies, but time is up. Now I know you may be very upset without us, but we will be here again tomorrow. As always, good bye beautifuls." Tamaki smiled as the original round of girls offered their last good-byes to their hosts before letting the next round sit.

Nikki stood and walked over to Kaoru and Hikaru, both of which were sighing and shaking their heads.

"Can you believe she kept thinking I was you, Hikaru?" the one that must be Kaoru said.

"I know, Kaoru…but that's not our fault she's not smart." Hikaru said with a pained note. They looked up to Nikki who was eyeing them with shy interest.

"Are you new?" Kaoru asked, taking her hand and standing, letting her take his seat.

"I…yes, I am. It's Kaoru…right? That's what your brother called you, isn't it?" Nikki watched as Kaoru and Hikaru stared at her with huge eyes.

"Y…yes. Lucky guess. You won't get it right again, though." Hikaru growled to her, the pain in his eyes was unmistakable.

"Hikaru! We are her hosts. That means we need to show her a good time! Not be mean." Kaoru scolded his brother then turned to Nikki. "I'm so sorry about him, we just have very few people who try enough to tell us apart. We've lived with disappointment for a long time." He explained to her.

"Hikaru, what if I want to learn you two? Be a friend?" Nikki looked Hikaru in his eyes and leaned towards him slightly. "I'm different."

"Bull shit." Hikaru hissed before turning from Nikki to face Kaoru. "How about you entertain her and I'll go take a nap?"

"What the hell, Hikaru?" Kaoru shouted, slapping his brother across the face. "She hasn't done anything to you! Just because she looks like everyone else doesn't mean she is! Give the new girl a chance."

"How about the two of you walk out of the room, come back in a couple minutes, and see if I can tell you apart? Hmm?" Nikki pushed the two apart before they could hurt themselves. They looked at her with shock on their faces.

"And if you're wrong?" Hikaru gave Nikki an evil smirk.

"I'll leave you alone, and I'll do whatever Kaoru wants me to for 3 months, since he doesn't hate me like you apparently do." The look on her face was stoic, and her voice calm.

"You up for "Which One's Hikaru?"" Kaoru smiled to his brother. They left quickly and Nikki watched them go, a twinge of regret in her stomach.

"You know you won't get it right. No one ever gets it right." The little blonde said in a sing-song tone with another piece of cake in his hands as he ran over to Nikki.

"I hope I get lucky then…It's Hunny, right?" the blonde nodded and Nikki smiled to herself. "Do you like being a Host, Hunny?"

"It's the best club ever! You get to meet new people and talk to pretty girls and play dress up all day! OH! And eats sweets too!" he jumped up and down happily as the silent boy walked over and tapped Hunny on his shoulder.

"Don't forget to brush your teeth." He said quietly.

"Ok Mori!" Hunny smiled and jumped onto Mori's back.

Minutes passed and Nikki began to worry the Twins had run off. She shifted her weight from one leg to the other as she waited, remembering every detail of the two boys and hoping her eyes would stay true. Kaoru and Hikaru entered the room finally, with their clothes mixed and hats on. Both held a stoic look, and their eyes showed no signs of emotion. They stood perfectly still, like identical statues.

"Neither of you speak…your voices are slightly different and I don't want that to be the only way I know the difference." Nikki walked around them and stopped before one Twin, placing a hand on his cheek. "Hello, Hikaru."

"I'm Kaoru." He replied. Nikki laughed and shook her head.

"That's bull shit. You walk like you're a lethal weapon while Kaoru walks like he's flying. Light on his feet with a happy bounce to his step. Don't lie to me, Hikaru." The Twins looked at each other for a few minutes before anything in the room moved.

"She's right, you know. You can't lie this time, Hikaru." Haruhi chimed in from the couches at the front of the room.

"How…there's no way you picked that up just as we left the room." Kaoru stared at Nikki, his head spinning. Nikki offered him a warm smile and a simple shrug.

"So what do we owe _you_." Hikaru hissed, but his eyes shining bright with hope for the new girl.

"The two of you owe me nothing. You, Hikaru, owe me an apology for being mean. Other than that, you never have to see me again, unless you want to." Nikki raised an eyebrow as Kaoru pushed Hikaru into a wall and followed that with angry whispers.

"Will you meet us tomorrow in the court yard?" Kaoru smiled and pulled off his hat, flipping it in his hands. Nikki nodded and gave a smile, this time to Hikaru, who was watching her with a guarded look that gave her the slightest hint he was excited and happy she could tell them apart. _Yep…defiantly a weird club_


End file.
